Last month we asked you to check how you talk to yourself inside your head.
It turns out many of our conversations with ourselves are variations on a theme of ‘Am I Good Enough?’
We give ourselves a hard time for not being better at being:
- parents/friends/workers/siblings/ cleaners/cooks….there’s really no end to the list
- and not being as good at any of the above (and more) as….all those people who are SO much better than us in every way
- we compare and despair
- we find ourselves somehow ‘wrong’ in so many situations
- we return from a social gathering worrying that we’ve said the wrong thing or not said enough, or just not been enough
- we get really good at perfectionism, never being able to be really satisfied with ourselves, or possibly other people too
It’s tiring and unsatisfying.
Ask these questions instead:
- When you find yourself lacking yet again, ask yourself ‘what if I’m actually good enough already?’
- How does it feel to accept myself right now – not perfect but certainly good enough?
- What if you fully welcome other people being good at things, enjoying their skills, their looks and their ability to earn money – and choose to be thrilled with what they have – and at the same time just fine with your own version of looks, money and abilities
I’d like you to just PLAY with these ideas and these questions…..enjoy….laugh gently at yourself….and experiment with doing life in this calmer, easier way
How does that change how you feel about yourself?
How does that change how you feel about others?
How does that change your ability to enjoy your life?